In mastering a craft it is important to figure out what about it gives you satisfaction. For me, my satisfaction in any craft is experimentation and discovery. Therefore hemming 20 pants is going to make me want to kill myself or someone else very quickly.

This is why I am a very selfish sewer. I didn’t spend years mastering my craft to make something I don’t really want to make. I have more than enough ideas for endless projects that I don’t need someone else telling me what to do.

The one exception for this is my boyfriend. Sewing for him comes from a very selfish shallow place though. It would be easy to say, “oh it’s love..” and some mushy gooshy nurturing nonsense. But no. Not even a little bit. It is because he can be a very pretty accessory and it gives me a weird amount of enjoyment when we coordinate our outfits. Not match completely! Coordinate. They ARE different things.


Now I know what you are thinking. You are thinking, “I can’t decide if this person is awesome or annoying”. The answer is definitely a little bit of both, especially when it comes to this. I view it as so cute I can’t look away because of joy, but I also want to vomit a little bit… because ew.


Just imagine that your friends are showing you pictures of their last camping trip, or beach trip, or vacation to some gorgeous ancient ruins. What do you see? Obviously the majestic landscape of their particular get away but also tourists. How do tourists dress? Horribly, usually in very annoying colors and shapes too that clash horribly with their surroundings. It is very annoying to see a beautiful landscape and in the mid ground a bunch of awkward- plastic visor toting- cargo pants humans wandering around. Of course your lovely friend is in the foreground and that is always nice. I think about how much work costume designers have to do on big sets with a lot of extras. Just to make the crowd of people look seamless and natural with the background must be a serious challenge. That doesn’t just happen on it’s own.


Now I don’t think that I am the majestic landscape in this scenario and he is the awkward tourist. It is just an easy example of the pleasure of visual cohesiveness or the annoyance at lack there of.


So when Mark and me are out in coordinating outfits it gives me a weird sense of satisfaction, similar to when you look at a balanced photo. You aesthetic brain just automatically decides, “That makes sense”. Yes it is only a visual impression, but whatever works right?

Don’t believe me that it is a thing? HERE is a costume designer talking about it!

Posted by:eyetradehandmade

3 replies on “(Selfish) Boyfriend Sewing Debunked

  1. I don’t sew much for my husband, but I have made him a few pieces. Whenever we go out, we coordinate a little. It presents a visual to everyone else that we are in sync. We’re also about equally “dressed up.” You see these concepts a lot in the Mad Men costumes by Janie Bryant. Anytime a male and female character are in clashing clothes, or when one is more dressed than the other, you know conflict is coming.


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