“If you’re in a pivot period—if you’re still bridging the space between where you are and where you want to be—remember that the person you’re becoming is already within you. The journey is convincing your mind to act consistently on what your heart already knows it wants to do. – Brianna Wiest”

A Yoga Instructor started a class with this quote, to set an intention for the following hour. It feels weird to start this post with this quote because of all the books I have challenged myself to read this past year The Pivot Year was not one of them. 

Like many, I have loved creating since I was a child, and like many a millennial I went to art college with the expectation that eventually the world would come to recognize my awesomeness. I do not think this is an unusual thought for the average 18-year-old entering higher education. 

I am 35 now and feel incredibly fortunate to have secure full-time employment as a craftsperson. My expectations of the world went very quickly from recognition of my artistic genius to a reliable weekly paycheck doing something that doesn’t destroy my soul. 

Over the years I have tried art markets, open art calls for galleries, open calls for magazines, the whole Etsy thing. I have never met with any version of fulfilling success: emotionally, financially, spiritually, etc. It got to the point where my partner said to me, “Why are you still doing this, it obviously doesn’t make you happy. If anything it makes you more stressed and unbalanced.” I went through periods where I tried to walk away from creating “art”, doubting if I was even allowed to call it that. But I kept thinking of concepts and kept trying to make them. I work slowly and am prone to reworking projects several times (problem-solver brain).  So I don’t even feel like I have much to show for how much time, energy, and thought I put into this part of my life… that I don’t even feel comfortable talking about with people.

In the summer of 2023 when my little art group of 10 years slowly dissolved (as many relationships do) I had to ask myself why I was still doing any of this stuff? I still wanted to, but why? And should I even try to share it with anyone at this point? What would be the point of that? 

I had a lot of questions and my curiosity was not satisfied with, “because I want to.” If I wanted to keep creating and sharing then I wanted a firm foundation and understanding of what I was doing and why. Honestly, so I would feel less like shit about myself. Let’s be real, the world’s indifference can be devastating if you don’t have your shit together. 

The past year I have read 6 books relating to the creative process to gain some insight. All different types of books by very different types of people to get my head on straight. To essentially get my brain caught up with my heart so I could stop torturing myself with annoying internalized expectations. It was frustrating that none of the authors flat-out said, “This is why you should make and share your work…” But the majority of them had a lot of overlapping information, which I didn’t expect but found cool. 

Let’s start with why you SHOULD NOT share your art:

For me, one of the main reasons not to share your art is to participate in the weird performative culture social media has turned our society into. This capturing our experience and filtering it for consumption can feel disingenuous and unnecessarily competitive. Personally, social media has felt like a very efficient transactional relationship resulting in any form of art exchange being unfilling.

“Our continual quest for efficiency discourages looking too deeply. The pressure to deliver doesn’t grant us time to consider all possibilities. Yet it’s through deliberate action and repetition that we gain deeper insight.” – Rick Rubin, The Creative Act, p114

“Over the last decade, both of us have witnessed, and experienced, a steady and consistent shift toward transactional relationships, where people are relating to one another more for production and output than for greater understanding and meaning. We all seem to be moving away from the kinds of transformational interactions that sustain and embolden us.” – Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross, Your Brain on Art, p201

“‘The creative artist and poet and saint must fight the actual (as opposed to ideal) gods of our society- the god of conformism as well as the gods of apathy, material success, and exploitative power. These are the ‘idols’ of our society that are worshiped by multitudes of people.’ Rollo May.” -Stephen Nachmanovitch, Free Play, p115

Another main reason not to share your art is validation. A lot of what I read had overlapping themes: no one cares about your art, no one needs your art, no one asked for your art, and it’s weird of you to assume anyone needed you to make or share anything. After that dose of reality, they usually bring up that you shouldn’t be making or sharing your work for those reasons anyhow.  Once you release a piece of work, it isn’t yours anymore. It belongs to whoever consumes it and changes accordingly.  If you are making work for the response then you are producing objects for consumerism.  There is nothing wrong with that, money is awesome, and figuring out how to support yourself by making art is also awesome. But that seems like a different ball game with different goals and processes. 

“If you think, ‘I don’t like it but someone else will,’ you are not making art for yourself. You’ve found yourself in the business of commerce, which is fine; it just may not be art.” -Rick Rubin, The Creative Act, p216 

“Artists who want and need to sell their work may thus be afflicted by no less than two judging specters… ‘Is this enough?’, ‘Is this commercial enough?’…What’s wanted is a sure thing, the assurance that we are getting a product whose value has been ratified by the authorities.” -Stephen Nachmanovitch, Free Play, p120

“Herzog wrote my friend a long reply of ferocious challenge, in which he said, more or less, this: ‘Quit your complaining. It’s not the world’s fault that you wanted to be an artist. It’s not the world’s job to enjoy the films you make, and it’s certainly not the world’s obligation to pay for your dreams. Nobody wants to hear it. Steal a camera if you must, but stop whining and get back to work.’” -Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic, p116

I am someone who requires validation in a very unhealthy way. To the point where I overcorrect and go out of my way to seem like I don’t care because I care way too much and am very aware I should not. This is the worst thought process around creating and is only going to lead to me continually trying to fill a bucket with a hole at the bottom. Sometimes creating art leads to a magical connection with the right person finding and appreciating it, but that’s not a healthy motivator. It will just lead to a lot of heartache.

“But I worry that what students of the arts are often seeking in higher education is nothing more than proof of their own legitimacy-proof that they are for real as creative people, because their degree says so. 
On one hand, I completely understand this need for validation; it’s an insecure pursuit, to attempt to create. But if you’re working on your craft every day on your own, with steady discipline and love, then you are already for real as a creator, and you don’t need to pay anybody to affirm that for you.” – Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic, p103

“It’s not uncommon to long for outward success, hopeful that it will fill a void inside ourselves. Some imagine achievement as a remedy to fix or heal a sense of not being enough.
Artists who work diligently to accomplish this are rarely prepared for the reality of it.”-Rick Rubin, The Creative Act, p220

“Are my choices comforting and nourishing my spirit, or are they temporary reprieves from vulnerability and difficult emotions ultimately diminishing my spirit? Are my choices leading to my Wholeheartedness, or do they leave me feeling empty and searching?” -Brene Brown, Daring Greatly, p147

If I am not making art for recognition, financial reasons, or because it makes me super duper happy, then why am I spending so much time and energy into making things? I’m so glad you asked because I honestly wanted to know why too.

Art is apparently integral to humans. One of the authors points out that there is evidence of human-made art 30 thousand years before there is evidence of organized agriculture. That is how natural it is to humans. Being curious and creating as a result is how our species has evolved. Humans will always be curious about themselves and their place in the world and art is one of the most natural expressions of that. Creating art is all about curiosity. Being curious about something and seeing what happens when you explore that idea. 

“To put the story in perspective, consider this fact: The earliest evidence of recognizable human art is forty thousand years old. The earliest evidence of human agriculture, by contrast, is only ten thousand years old. Which means that somewhere in our collective evolutionary story, we decided it was way more important to make attractive, superfluous items than it was to learn how to regularly feed ourselves.” -Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic, p87

“This led to another revelation about evolution that Ed (Edward O. Wilson) shared: “Along with ants, bees, wasps, and termites, we humans are one of only nineteen species on the entire planet that are eusocial. In other words, we work together to ensure our collective future. Group selection over individual survival developed with the core human traits we have honed to this day including sympathy, empathy, and teamwork,”…Strong social skills became a hereditary trait favored in genetics, and aesthetic distinction (creative expression) became the path for social identity.” -Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross, Your Brain on Art, p204

“This is because our instinctual exploratory drive runs deeper than simply satiating base animal needs. Rather, human curiosity is aligned with the very human need for sense-making.

This drive to gain knowledge for knowledge’s sake is unique to humans…Our brains have evolved to create everything from the Great Pyramids to the Mona Lisa to the smartphone, but this level of cognitive development is only made possible by curiosity for the enjoyment of it and not just to close a cognitive gap.” -Monica C. Parker, The Power of Wonder, p43

Why do I want to share my art? 

I found a lot of information that could answer this question. The effect art has on the human body, both in the making and in the consumption, has been proven to be incredibly beneficial. To the extreme where doctors have started prescribing art-making for certain patients. I found a lot of mysterious information like: how emotions have frequencies, viewing art (even bad art) evokes empathy, how humans can unconsciously sync up (entrainment), how social dancing (even with strangers) makes people feel less alone, etc. But what spoke to me the most was that art activates the “social” part of the brain. I always saw art as a form of expression, but I interpreted this new information as MAKING art IS communicating. But making it and not sharing it feels like a one-sided conversation. 

“Just as many parts of the brain light up when we are learning and using social skills, the arts engage multiple parts of the brain as well. The researchers found that ‘art essentially engages the social brain,’…Art, the researchers write, ‘is inherently a social construct and for this reason, art engagement recruits the same brain networks as complex social behavior.’ Therefore, they add, ‘we propose…that the meaning and experience of an artwork is always created in social context.’” -Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross, Your Brain on Art, p223

“Sharing something that you’ve created is a vulnerable but essential part of engaged and Wholehearted living. It’s the epitome of daring greatly.” 

“These cultures also nurture engaged, tenacious people who expect to have to try and try again to get it right-people who are much more willing to get innovative and creative in their efforts.” -Brene Brown, Daring Greatly, p63 and p64

“Empathy researcher Jamil Zaki describes art as “empathy boot camp”. Bill English, artistic director for San Franciso Playhouse calls their space an “empathy gym.” Art arouses openness and curiosity, even if it may not evoke awe all the time. Some researchers believe the act of viewing art qua art -meaning viewing the Mona Lisa as a piece of art in the Louvre as opposed to seeing a print of the Mona Lisa on a sweatshirt-activates a specific type of schema in our mind, making us more open and curious as we experience the work through our “art schema” rather than within our “day-to-day schema.”” -Monica C. Parker, The Power of Wonder, p132

So for the big question: why should I share my art?

The answer I found over the past year through all my self-imposed reading homework was for the character challenge. Which sounds dumb, but that’s what made the most sense to me. Life and art aren’t solely about happy experiences, success, and avoiding conflict. It’s all about meeting challenges, both self-imposed and not. Making art and not sharing it feels like planting a seed and not giving it water or sunlight. Seeds are wonderful, and many don’t sprout, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t worth trying to plant and see what happens. I am not supposed to know what the response to my work will be and I am not supposed to be able to control it. Sharing is about how I respond to my work’s exposure.

“The Western idea of practice is to acquire a skill. It is very much related to our work ethic, which enjoins us to endure struggle or boredom now in return for future rewards. The Eastern idea of practice, on the other hand, is to create the person, or rather to actualize or reveal the complete person who is already there. This is not practice for something, but complete practice, which suffices unto itself.” – Stephen Nachmanovitch, Free Play, p67

“By inviting yourself to be open to the unknown, the object created is no longer the goal. “It’s reframing art-making as a process of becoming yourself, and the things that you’re making along the way are just the artifact of that process,” he (Nicholas Wilton of Art2Life) says.” -Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross, Your Brain on Art, p185

“‘What if we could use awe, not to get rid of conflict-conflict is essential, conflict is how your brain expands, it’s how your brain learns-but rather, to enter conflict in a different way?’ asks neuroscientist Beau Lotto. ‘And what if awe could enable us to enter it in at least two different ways? One, to give us the humility and courage not to know…To enter conflict with a question instead of an answer…And the second is, in entering conflict that way, to seek to understand rather than convince.’” -Monica C. Parker, The Power of Wonder, p200

“Releasing a work into the world becomes easier when we remember that each piece can never be a total reflection of us, only a reflection of who we are in this moment…Hanging on to your work is like spending years writing the same entry in a diary. Moments and opportunities are lost.” -Rick Rubin, The Creative Act, p195

When I made my etsy in 2012 I decided to name my shop Eyetrade. This was because art felt like the ultimate form of truth to me, it is a trade in perspectives. In the sense we can both look at the same exact piece of art in the same room at the same time and have completely different experiences. Art is the only place where conflicting responses are expected and accepted. Even though we all experience the world like this every single day. The majority of people don’t view truth as complex. Which I get, it makes it hard to get anything done when there isn’t a black and white answer. 

“Emotions, on the other hand, are processed in the limbic system deep in the brain and are not always consciously registered. Sometimes, our motor areas ignite faster than the prefrontal cortex is able to contextualize what’s happening.”

“For us, it reaffirmed just how much enriched environments have a physiological effect on us, and how much of our past experience can inform our present reality.” -Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross, Your Brain on Art, p22 and p23

“If someone chooses to share feedback, listen to understand the person, not the work. People will tell you more about themselves than about the art when giving feedback. We each see a unique world.” -Rick Rubin, The Creative Act, p193

Even twelve years ago the whole point of creating was to share my perspective, to communicate. And just like communication in any relationship, the only thing I can control are my actions and my responses. (There is some insight in here about my unhealthy compulsion to anticipate people’s needs.) Therefore I should create because I am looking for something within as opposed to without. I think other people’s perspectives are vital to the process, to the conversation. But it’s damaging for me when other’s responses change the reason for why I am creating and what I am creating. Which is a very fine line to walk. I would guess there was a lot written about the importance of resilience for this very reason.

“When we stop caring about what people think, we lose our capacity for connection. When we become defined by why people think, we lose our willingness to be vulnerable. If we dismiss all the criticism, we lose out on important feedback, but if we subject ourselves to the hatefulness, our spirits get crushed. It’s a tightrope, shame resilience is the balance bar, and the safety net below is the one or two people in our lives who can help us reality-check the criticism and cynicism.” -Brene Brown, Daring Greatly, p 169

“The primary aim is not to receive notes or opinions. This is your work, your expression. You are the only audience that matters. The intention is for you to experience the work anew…We’re not necessarily looking for an outside perspective. We are more interested in widening our own.” -Rick Rubin, The Creative Act, p192

“Anyone who wants to express meaning in symbols and words, in music, in paint, has got to have a taste for impossible tasks, a willingness to tolerate great frustration…” – Stephen Nachmanovitch, Free Play, p195

I create art because I am curious and I share art because I am even more curious. 

I found it funny that while I was reading all of these books written by professionals analyzing the creative process the book that laid it out very simply for me was the fantasy novel Uprooted written by the amazing Naomi Novik. 

“…truth didn’t mean anything without someone to share it with; you could shout truth into the air forever, and spend your life doing it, if someone didn’t come and listen.”

― Naomi Novik, Uprooted 

Truth is easy alone, the challenge is in the sharing. 

Reading List: 

Brown, B. Ph.D, LMSW. (2015). Daring Greatly. Avery an imprint Penguin Random House.

Gilbert, E. (2016). Big Magic. Riverhead Books.

Magsamen, S. & Ross, I. (2023). Your Brain on Art. Random House.

Parker, M.C.(2023). The Power of Wonder. TarcherPerigee

Nachmanovitch, S. (1990). Free Play. Tarcher Putnam.

Rubin, R. (2023). The Creative Act. Penguin Press. 

Novik, N. (released 5.19.2015). Uprooted. Random House Audio.

Ch.24, 12:14